Cut the Shit

Busy Gay Bee

I have so much to say today that I have to do this in bite-size nuggets. You understand because you LOVE nuggets. Especially since these nuggets are chock full of gay themed goodness!

Last Friday Night

Thank you to those of you who offered up support during my evening of crapshit. Everything smoothed itself over by Saturday afternoon, so it all worked out ok. I really have to stop holding myself up to such high and unrealistic standards. I always feel as though if I screw up even minutely, I deserve to thrown off a bridge. That’s completely unnecessary and in all actuality, total bullshit. I swear I’ll start to relax a bit more and ride the crimson wave. Except not so much crimson as I haven’t gotten my period in years.

Late Friday Night

I had my second date with V. We had appetizers and a few drinks. And guess what? I totally misinterpreted him as not being interested in me! In reality he’s just an incredibly boring and lame guy! My bad! The hour and a half that I spent with him was absolutely painstaking. He didn’t laugh once even though I was delivering some of my best material. Ask me if I laughed? Why yes I did! At my own jokes. He just sat there like a literal lump on a log. So basically all I gots to say about that one is ADIOS V! Nice dating you. Actually that’s a lie. It wasn’t very nice dating you at all.

Saturday

On Saturday afternoon I had lunch with my parents and some family friends. We went to Spanky's BBQ in Times Square (click on the link to see funny pig stuff) and although it was over priced, the pulled pork sandwich I had was fanfuckingtastic. AND, my new obsession is deep fried pickles with dipping sauce. Paul and I had them recently and I became legitimately addicted. When I saw them on the menu at Spanks, I jizzed all over myself and made everyone try them (without the jizz of course). Of course, they all fell in love. And my mom brought me all sorts of little presents. I got a new Armistead Maupin book “Maybe the Moon” and some new clothes and treats for Tyler. She also bought me a shitload of candy, which is GREAT, but not for my upcoming summer waistline. It’s ok tho…I ate every bit of it in two sittings so at least it’s out of my cupboards.

NYC AIDS WALK 2006

On Sunday I marched with 47,000 other people in an effort to raise awareness and funds to fight the AIDS epidemic. It was one of the most surreal experiences I’ve ever had. So many people all there for the same reason. Best part: being able to freely hold Paul’s hand as we walked amongst the group. Worst part: Tyler got tremendous diarrhea and consequently caused many of my friends and me to get separated from our pre-arranged team. But we eventually got him cleaned up and he had the best time ever. He’s still sleeping off his “walking hangover”. Oh! And let’s not forget about the big, fat, beast of a woman who shoved us out of the way while we were walking, only to say “I have nothing against you gays, but when I can’t get where I’m trying to go, I get pissed!” A few of us had some choice words for her, but ultimately, she’ll pay for her ignorance when all of her yellow teeth fall out.

This Upcoming Weekend

After months of trying to figure out how I was going to afford it and plan for it, I have the opportunity this weekend to go see one of my favorite people on the entire planet: Miss Rita Lovely! Rita gave birth to her first baby girl at the tail end of last year and I have yet to hold that gorgeous child. I get there on Friday and I have two whole days of playing with Ruby and talking about everything under the sun with my bestest. We will make food and watch movies and drink wine and absolutely maximize every possible second we have together. Rita and I haven’t seen each other in over 6 months, so I’m not sure who needs this visit more. Rita or myself. Probably both!

TONIGHT!

After months of waiting, tonight Ari and I are going to see “RENT” on Broadway! I got us the tickets for her birthday and we are making a full date night out of it. We will both leave work at 5pm, head to dinner at an adorable restaurant in midtown and then off to my friend Angie’s for a quick toke before the show. Then at 8pm, you can picture us sitting in the center of the orchestra (5th row) watching one of the best shows to ever grace the Great White Way! I counted up the amount of times I’ve seen the show on Broadway and I’m both proud and embarrassed to report that tonight’s viewing will be my 9th. UM. Is there something wrong with me that I get equally as excited to see it every time I go? The movie was thoroughly enjoyable, but seeing it live is a whole experience and an unforgettable one at that. Ari is like a stone when it comes to showing emotion, but I’m hoping for just one tear to appear at some point during the production. If not, no biggie. I just hope that she’s moved by it. But even so, having a date night like this is something we never get to do. I’m so excited I’ve almost given myself a headache.

Another DOG!

Paul and I have decided to get another puppy. It probably won’t happen for a couple more months, but it’s a definite. Sure there are some worries that go along with that, but I’ll leave those thoughts to my parents and friends who think I’ve lost my mind by getting another one. As far as I’m concerned, this is a fantastic idea. We will be using the same breeder that my parents used, so Tyler will be a cousin of the new puppy. Yet there is only one Tyler and I will always love him the most. The new puppy will be Paul’s, so there will be no competition between who loves who more. Yet, I just know that I’m going to be the one to teach this new dog the lay of the land. But that’s ok. I’m getting good at it.

New Songs that I just LURVE

I’m not a big Rhianna fan, but I am LOVING the new “Unfaithful” track. I will download that shit immediately. Also, who knew that Panic at the Disco! was so fucking fantastic? Download “I Write Sins, not Tragedies” for an edgy new tune. And lastly, as though my Big Love obsession couldn’t have gotten any deeper…I’ve rediscovered some old Beach Boy music that brings me back to my childhood. The opening credits of the show are some of the finest I’ve EVER seen. I’ve been watching it at least 4 times in a row before I actually start the episode (I usually watch it ON DEMAND). It took me about two viewings before I downloaded “God Only Knows” and I may just go ahead and barrel through the old tunes until I end up purchasing “Kokomo”. You know how it goes.

And that’s all for now! So much more to come, so stay tuned!